I submitted an alternative suggestion to Cardinal…and informed Monsignor Murphy.

January 24, 1992

I suggested that sex education in the classroom be stopped, and an archdiocesan course for parents substituted. This course would present the family encyclicals and the sacrament of marriage. It would restore the reverence, mystery and reserve necessary when approaching the sexual sphere.

Cardinal Bernard Law
2121 Commonwealth Avenue
Boston, MA 02135

Dear Cardinal Law:

Over the weekend I had an idea. All of the Archdiocesan guidelines on sexuality, and the people in charge of sex-ed programs as well, speak of the parents’ prime responsibility to educate their own children. Frequently, they go on to say that the parents don’t know how, and that the parents don’t.

Why not couple trashing the bad sex-ed programs with a new announced intention of the Archdiocese to institute workshops and an audio tape series for parents? It would be a marvelous opportunity to teach the true meaning of chastity and lecture on key Church documents such as Casti cannubi, Humanae Vitae, Illius Divini Magistri, Vatican II, and the like. The teaching could focus on the sacredness of marriage and, at the same time, offer practical wisdom gleaned from experts such as Melvin Anchell or Janet Smith or Alice von Hildebrand. This could be a tool of evangelization, and the whole project could be consecrated to Mary, our Mother Most Pure.

By assisting parents in formation of their own children, you could claim a “sex education program” (really, properly called spiritual formation) and disclaim sex initiation. You would have control of the process. You can hand pick people who strictly conform to Church teaching to develop the program. Tapes would guarantee uniformity of delivery. Your parish priests, who are ultimately responsible to you, could lead parent discussion groups. In addition, you follow the theme of ministry to families outlined by the U.S. bishops.

But most especially, you recognize the sacred vocation of marriage. Parents, who received the sacrament of marriage, contracted with God and He with them, that he would help them in all that pertains to the upbringing of their own children. John Paul II gives us this assurance: “You will receive in prayer everything you need to be the parents God wants you to be.”

Even Msgr. Bill Murphy’s letter spoke of possibility of improvement. Isn’t parent education and evangelization just such an improvement?

Certainly I have given you lots to think and pray about. Rely on Mary, Christ’s precious gift to us and on your own dear Mother for inspiration on this delicate subject. On Friday, I forgot to say that I ask God to comfort you in your loss. Your mother was a grand lady, and I know she watches over you from heaven.

Love,

Alice A. Grayson